Welcome to the memorial page for
Barbara Clark
August 3, 1940 ~ April 5, 2017 (age 76) 76 Years Old Light a Candle
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Message from Jason Feldstein
August 29, 2018 10:09 PM
I only just learned of her passing today, and I'm sitting here at work with tears streaming down my face.
She was the first truly great, passionate, and loving teacher I ever had, aside from my own mother. I was very young when I was in her pre-kindergarten class, but I remember some telling details that I would like to share.
I recently figured out that I'm genderfluid, and have been as long as I can remember. This is because of my memories of her class. She had a big bin of clothing, all mixed up and not divided by gender at all. She seemed to understand that when Ryan and I would dress up as Mr. and Mrs. Mean, we were doing some kind of satire of cranky adults that was psychologically important for us. I only realized less than a week ago that Mrs. Mean is my first ever memory of doing drag. I will always be grateful for the way she created a safe space for me to explore my gender identity, long before I even had the words for such a concept.
I remember how she would always play "The Greatest Love of All" by Whitney Houston. She wanted us to remember the importance of self-esteem always, and told us that often.
I remember how she brought in Danny Chetlin to show us what he knew about karate and dispel some common myths kids all had back then from The Karate Kid.
I remember making crafts for a fund-raising fair for Shady Lane, and being so attached to mine that I needed my parents to buy it for me. My love of creating art probably started with her.
Most of all, I remember that she never talked down to us. She treated us not like children, but like regular people who happened to be small and young. She always had faith in our ability to grasp complex concepts, and as a result, we rarely disappointed her. I spent a wonderful, transformative long weekend at my new college in San Francisco this past weekend, and now I know why the teaching style of all the professors there touched me in such a deep way: It reminded me of Barbara Clark.
We always got to use her full name, too. No honorifics, no titles, just two people talking on a level playing field. It's what Lao Tzu liked to call "Leading by not leading", in other words, leading in such a way that the other people in the room don't realize or care (or sometimes even notice) that you're the leader. It is a rare talent, but she definitely had it.
That's why I always used to come to visit on Halloween. I'd been meaning to try doing that again, a few years ago, but I worried it might be seen as creepy as an adult. That's about my own social anxiety, though. I never felt anything but welcome in your house, Harry and Dina. I want you to know I am so grateful to her and to you for making my childhood so happy, bright, and full of creativity. I hope you are all doing well, and that perhaps we can talk a bit soon.
She was the first truly great, passionate, and loving teacher I ever had, aside from my own mother. I was very young when I was in her pre-kindergarten class, but I remember some telling details that I would like to share.
I recently figured out that I'm genderfluid, and have been as long as I can remember. This is because of my memories of her class. She had a big bin of clothing, all mixed up and not divided by gender at all. She seemed to understand that when Ryan and I would dress up as Mr. and Mrs. Mean, we were doing some kind of satire of cranky adults that was psychologically important for us. I only realized less than a week ago that Mrs. Mean is my first ever memory of doing drag. I will always be grateful for the way she created a safe space for me to explore my gender identity, long before I even had the words for such a concept.
I remember how she would always play "The Greatest Love of All" by Whitney Houston. She wanted us to remember the importance of self-esteem always, and told us that often.
I remember how she brought in Danny Chetlin to show us what he knew about karate and dispel some common myths kids all had back then from The Karate Kid.
I remember making crafts for a fund-raising fair for Shady Lane, and being so attached to mine that I needed my parents to buy it for me. My love of creating art probably started with her.
Most of all, I remember that she never talked down to us. She treated us not like children, but like regular people who happened to be small and young. She always had faith in our ability to grasp complex concepts, and as a result, we rarely disappointed her. I spent a wonderful, transformative long weekend at my new college in San Francisco this past weekend, and now I know why the teaching style of all the professors there touched me in such a deep way: It reminded me of Barbara Clark.
We always got to use her full name, too. No honorifics, no titles, just two people talking on a level playing field. It's what Lao Tzu liked to call "Leading by not leading", in other words, leading in such a way that the other people in the room don't realize or care (or sometimes even notice) that you're the leader. It is a rare talent, but she definitely had it.
That's why I always used to come to visit on Halloween. I'd been meaning to try doing that again, a few years ago, but I worried it might be seen as creepy as an adult. That's about my own social anxiety, though. I never felt anything but welcome in your house, Harry and Dina. I want you to know I am so grateful to her and to you for making my childhood so happy, bright, and full of creativity. I hope you are all doing well, and that perhaps we can talk a bit soon.
Message from Sally Gould
April 26, 2017 4:27 PM
Harry and family,
I was saddened to read of Barbara's passing. My family has wonderful memories of her at Shady Lane School. My deepest sympathy.
Sally
I was saddened to read of Barbara's passing. My family has wonderful memories of her at Shady Lane School. My deepest sympathy.
Sally
Message from Etta Cox
April 18, 2017 1:23 PM
Dr. Clark, you always exhibited and spoke of the love you had for your beautiful wife. I send to you and your family my most heartfelt condolences. May God Bless you all.
A candle was lit by Quintin Stubbs
on April 9, 2017 12:26 PM
Message from Quintin Stubbs
April 9, 2017 12:25 PM
Mrs. Clark was an amazing woman she is one of the few teachers who impacted my life at East Hills ISA . I only had Mrs. Clark for first grade but in that time she made a difference in my life. I wish my daughters would of had the chance to meet her. I am truly sorry for her family and friends loss I send my deepest condolences.
Message from L.Bentley
April 8, 2017 11:33 PM
Dr. Clark and family, I am very sorry for your loss. Jesus wept after the death of his friend Lazarus. John 11:35. We mourn along with you. May the God who binds up the brokenhearted and comforts all who mourn sustain and surround you, until you meet again, Psalm 147:3.
Message from Pfeuffer Famiy
April 8, 2017 2:18 PM
Harry, We are so sorry for your loss. Our prayers go out to you and your family. I wished we could be there, but are on a spring vacation. Please let us know if there is anything we can do.
Will, Susan, Ashlyn and Aryan
Will, Susan, Ashlyn and Aryan
A candle was lit by Cheryl and Scott Wise; Johnny, this candle is lit for her!
on April 7, 2017 10:08 PM
Message from Chuck Hosick
April 7, 2017 11:56 AM
So sorry to hear this. May God rest her sweet soul and may perpetual light shine upon her.
Message from G.W.
April 7, 2017 8:24 AM
I am sorry about the death of your dear loved one. May you find some comfort in the words found at Isaiah 25:8 which says that God will swallow up death forever and he will wipe away the tears from all faces.
Message from Ellen Allen Owens
April 6, 2017 11:12 PM
I am very sad to hear about Barbara passing. We had many good times together growing up in Beltzhoover in years past. She was a dear friend. When a loved one becomes a memory that memory becomes a treasure. She will be treasured in my heart always. May blessings comfort Barbara's family during this time of sorrow. Keep a special place for her in your heart.
A candle was lit by Ellen Allen Owens
on April 6, 2017 11:05 PM
Message from Susan Walsh
April 6, 2017 8:55 PM
This unique and unbelievably beautiful soul has been set free... I cannot find adequate words to say what's in my heart - what Barbara meant to me, how much I cherished our friendship. Please know that all of my love is with each of you, and that my heart sends you comfort and peace.
A candle was lit by Linda cook
on April 6, 2017 4:31 PM
Message from Linda cook, tara and morgan cook
April 6, 2017 4:30 PM
I am so sorry to hear of Barbara's passing. Barbara was a beautiful wife and mom. Lifting the family in prayer.
A candle was lit by Cathy Flaugher
on April 6, 2017 3:37 PM
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